You can often hear complaints from moms: “This child does not want to learn anything!”. What if a schoolboy, instead of preparing for lessons, plays computer games all day long? It seems that the children of girlfriends are completely different. They diligently do their homework, win at school competitions and bring home only good grades. In fact, often the child refuses to learn through no fault of his own. The reasons may be mass, but we consider the main ones.
So, what could be the reasons that a child does not want to learn?
Communication with classmates
Adoption into a team is an important part of every person’s life. Children react to the fact that they are left behind, more vulnerable than adults. In addition, they often have no choice: they don’t choose school and class.
It is unlikely that the child will be happy to run for lessons if the relationship in the class does not add up. Remember, when you have conflicts with someone, it is difficult for you to focus on your work and perform it qualitatively. So is the student: a large amount of resources is spent on “keeping yourself in shape” in a hostile team. What kind of study?
Learning problems can arise if a child contracts a “bad company.” Teens, for example, love to copy the behavior of leaders and are very afraid to be out of work if they behave correctly. If it is not customary in his company to do “homework” and obey the teachers, the child will try to behave the same way.
Be interested in not only homework but also school life in general. Avoid direct questioning, try to play on trust. Tell us about your school childhood and how you coped in this or that situation.
The child’s complaint that his classmates hurt him is by no means threatened: “Wow, I’ll call their mothers now and tell the classroom!” They do not like, and if you want to influence the status of the child in the team, talk to the teacher in private and ask them not to spread information further.
Invite your son or daughter to call the guys from the new class to the skating rink or go on the carousel ride. In an informal setting, it is easier to communicate.
If it seems to you that the child has contacted the “bad company”, try to switch his attention unobtrusively to an interesting hobby, leisure or event. Maybe there he will find new friends.
A problem in a particular teacher or subject
Sometimes you notice that a child refuses to teach only one particular subject. For the rest, he has good grades. Perhaps the fact is that the student missed an important topic, and now incomprehensible things piled on him like a snowball.
And maybe the matter is in the teacher. Without a doubt, one who teaches children must be impartial. But they are people too, and you cannot do without pets and outsiders.
Start with dialogue. Listen to all sides: talk with the teacher and the child. If the child does not want to learn, it is likely that there is not enough motivation from the school side. Maybe he really does not understand this particular subject. And maybe the truth, the teacher nags him.
Here you need to play the role of judge and listen to both parties. Do not scold the child and do not scandal with the school.
Those items that seem boring to a child can be made more interesting on their own. Make together an interesting experience in physics, go to the zoological museum, play a math game. And watch your child’s eyes light up.
During the homework check, pay special attention to this particular subject. If necessary, explain to the student a complex topic. Avoid the prefix “not” in conversations with him. “You do not understand!”, “You will not succeed!” – these phrases are unlikely to help a child tune in to study and get a good grade.
By the way, about the estimates. The modern approach to learning is distinguished by the fact that in the first place are knowledge, and then – evaluation. This is due to a change in the structure of the labor market.
In general, do not dwell on assessments. Much more important is the development of the child.
If you are sure that there is a conflict with the teacher, then do not delay the matter and talk to him. Do not shout and do not be nervous, listen to the position of the teacher and prepare counter-arguments. Listen to the teacher’s comments. Maybe he is right?
It is difficult for the child to comply with the regime
The first time in the first grade, the transition to the first shift, changes in the school timetable … All this may adversely affect the results of studies.
The early ups and the whole nightmare associated with them are familiar to many parents. Wake-up call, and then another mom persuades to get up by the hour. In the morning you want to sleep, everyone is nervous, everyone is in a hurry.
Talk to your child. Maybe it’s hard for him to get up early. Maybe he has trouble falling asleep. Maybe it is difficult for him to allocate his time so as not to get tired.
If the student has additional classes (sections, circles), this may give an additional burden, including emotional. Which inevitably leads to fatigue and apathy.
Do not take the schoolboy’s sudden refusal to study and do homework as lazy. This may indeed be due to overload. Especially if you see that a previously zealous child now refuses to do homework. The point here is probably not in laziness, but in the fact that the poor schoolboy does not withstand these loads.
Try to exclude any circle or elective from its tight schedule. Then look if it helped improve performance.
Well helps change the situation. Spend one-weekend lesson, while the other goes all day to the zoo or entertainment center. The child will receive positive emotions and begin to gnaw the granite of science with new forces.
And finally, some more tips for parents:
- Do not blame the child, and state the facts. “It’s late, and homework is not done.”
- Give the student a choice. For example, from which object to start doing the “homework”. Do not put a strict time frame to complete tasks.
- Do not put in the example of other children. This will only cause aggression and loss of motivation.
- Talk about what you like and what upsets you. “I liked it so much that yesterday you quickly and correctly solved all the examples in mathematics.” “I was upset that you until recently dragged with homework and then did it not quite right.”
- Be interested in not only the school affairs of the child. Genuinely rejoice in his success, but do not let us surrender at defeat.