Do you like to receive orders from your parents, obey and can make them aware that this is not love in a healthy relationship, without incurring reproaches, judgments and sometimes a beating?
What are the consequences of doing or not doing what your parents order you and what are the consequences of doing nothing and having what you want?
Why do their parents seek, what is the motive, to control it against their will and without being aware of their interests and desires?
How many times have you felt being treated as an inferior being, an employee, a servant by your parents and your teachers as well?
Do not be discouraged, all children and even their parents were treated like that. The question is whether you want to continue this farce, or choose to live freely.
Can you, as a child, make known to your parents what true love is and have pleasant family relationships or is that a lost cause?
What are the consequences of telling children what to do or not?
What are the consequences in children’s lives of telling them what is right or wrong to do according to the parents’ value judgments?
What are the consequences in children’s lives of obeying their parents or will they be punished?
What are the consequences in children’s lives of showing that parents are superior to them by their title and function?
What are the consequences in the lives of children, to impose conditions and rules to follow?
Indeed, parents do not know the consequences because they have obeyed their whole life and thus have never discovered their own truth through experience. Then, they say the only truth they know, that is, of others.
However, the consequences are easy to observe. Just look at your parents … If you like what you see, then you is going to be like them. If you do not like what you see, then you will have disagreements in order not to be like them.
What is the reason for parents to want to control a child through orders?
Why do parents tell children that what they order to do or stop doing is for their own good asking them to refuse, to forget, to feel guilty in the name of love in order to come to an end?
What do children understand about love? That that has to be a necessity, conditions, judgments? Would it not be wiser to explain to children the possible consequences of their decision to make and leave them the freedom to choose them?
Why do parents give their children everything and then complain that their children are like kings and queens and have no motivation, initiative to do something valuable?
What do children understand about their own power? That what they want in life should be obtained from others instead of being the source of valuable creation for others? Would it not be wiser to explain to children the possible consequences of their decision to make and leave them the freedom to choose?
Children are able to make decisions
Parents probably believe that children cannot make informed decisions, but how can they help them in this sense, if they cannot learn from their mistakes or from being able to make a small decision themselves?
Is failure a step to success or a fear of making a mistake? So why not give them the freedom to express themselves, to make a decision, when their life is not in danger?
Observe the adults and you will easily see the consequences of a life without love, without friendly initiative in the relationship, a life in conflicts, wars and fierce competition. This is how he has educated his children, not to make decisions and wait on others or need for others. This is not a life, it is a death.
Do parents think they are superior to children because they give them food for survival? And spiritual and relational food, what do you do?
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When the children have begun to doubt them?
Have you noticed that you began to have problems with your parents, the day you asked them questions to understand, that you reflected for yourself? And it’s the same at school, do not you think?
When he was younger he made him believe that his parents loved him unconditionally, but today, you observe and realize that you unconsciously use conditions to control him. And the two most important conditions are undoubtedly your survival needs and your needs to be loved.
You depend on them and your parents know this very well. It is enough then to agree with your parents and thus receive the love with conditions. This is not love, but quite the opposite.
This seduction is disastrous for you because it creates self-forgetfulness, seeking the approval of others to make yourself love, to compensate for that false feeling of love that you believe to be true. Then you depend on others to love yourself and you come obsessed with that need.
Is it love or the obsession of being loved?
You are probably said to be their parents and they love you, but they have also forgotten who they are. They are constantly wanting, needing to be loved by others, their parents, their children, their spouse. They are so obsessed with this need that they are not aware that what they are looking for is already in them.
It is enough to be kind in your relationship, to be love.
Observe the world, which seeks the exterior of them, the way to be recognized and receive attention and love. They use all kinds of popular forms so that others can see them, love them, notice them, recognize them, because they are not really aware of them, nor love each other.
If they did love, they would not need to receive the love and recognition of others. You would give it knowing that what is given to others, it is to yourself that you give it.
The illusion of need is necessary to have an option
However, this obsession, this need for love of others is perfect, because in the absence of it, you cannot choose to love yourself first and know yourself and for yourself.
You do not need to be loved by your parents. It is enough to love yourself, regardless of whether your parents love you or not.
If you need at whatever price your parents want you, then you live in dependency, in fear, in lack of freedom in forgetting yourself, waiting all your life.
In addition, all your relationships will have their basis in the need of the other person, creating many conflicts, separations and divisions.
However, these dependencies are just occasions to offer you the opportunity to choose a life without depending on others to survive and without relying on people to be loved.
In fact, it is by loving yourself through the relationship with the other person that you are freed from the need to be loved and it is by having your own business that you are freed from the need for survival.
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Can you, as a child, make your parents aware of what love is?
Probably not: Your parents are so convinced they know life better than you, because they were born before you. But what matters is not to know his life, to know first of all?
What matters in life is not that people have 75 years of experience, but what kind of experiences have they lived for 75 years? New experiences and feelings to evolve in consciousness or the same experiences to avoid changing unconscious habits!
If you tell your parents that you do not need to be loved, what do you think would happen? If you tell your parents they do not need you to love them, what do you think would happen?
They would not understand. But the truth is not if they understand but see if they intend to understand something they do not know! Do you understand the difference between understanding and understanding?
Therefore, your happiness, your joy would not be in the expectation of others, but in you. And to feel it, it would only have to express it freely to the others in their relationships, without ever waiting or needing the others to give it to them.